Mudsex

***** DISCLAIMER: This MUD is for for adults. See 'help aup'. The following is mature content intended for adults, which some people may find objectionable. These guidelines are not intended for real life use in any way. *****

Mudsex is acting out an intimate scene in the MUD, usually consisting of heavy emote usage (see 'help emote'). Many people find the 60-character limit on emotes crippling, but with a little creativity, one will find this is not the case. In fact, consider it a good limit. Too-long emotes tend to be trite, wordy and flowery and often the intended effect is lost.

Some suggestions for mudsex:

  • Have mudsex with a partner you trust. Logs can be exchanged easily. While logs are easily doctored, people will believe what they want to believe.

  • Creators are watching. ALL THE TIME. If you are going to engage in sexual activities in the MUD, remember that Big Brother is watching. Do not do anything you'd be ashamed of someone else seeing.

  • There's no need for safe sex. This is a fantasy MUD! Engage in all the rampant, deviant multiple-partner sex you want without repercussion! Just keep the two previous guidelines in mind. Remember: Pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases have not been coded as of this helpfile. However, be aware of other social repercussions. Engaging in intimacy with your baron's wife without his permission may result in your character enjoying a permanent ocean view.

  • It may depend on you and your partner(s), but it is usually a good rule of thumb to keep it as subtle as possible. A MUD is about imagination, and if your textual tryst is too vulgar and explicit, the sex may not be as enjoyable for one or all of you. People generally like to fill in the blanks with their minds. Words like 'cock, pussy, dick' are better suited to bedroom talk (real life or on the MUD), but try to avoid using such slang in emotes.

    Example of BAD mudsex: Frank stuffs his huge, throbbing, rock-hard cock into your sopping pussy and starts thrusting hard.

    Example of better mudsex: Frank roughly enters you and begins to move with a hard, steady pace.

    You see, while you might want to reinforce the fact that your character's penis is large, hard, and throbbing, this may be better indicated by spoken text (Frank exclaims in dwarvish, 'I'm so hard for you, Jane!'), or already inferred by your partner (who wants a flaccid, tiny penis in an imaginary partner, anyway?).

  • On the same token, try to avoid clinical terms. 'Jane lightly flicks her tongue over your glans penis,' is a deal-breaker, folks.

  • It's good to establish a turn-based emote pattern in an OOC discussion before engaging in intimate activity. You don't want the embarassing MUD-equivalent of premature ejaculation happening to you because you emoted out of turn!

    Example: Frank moans. Frank turns you over, laying you on your stomach. Jane wraps her legs around your hips.

    Don't let this happen to you!

  • Try to avoid the whole one-handed typing bit. If your partner(s) are kept waiting too long for a response from you, they may begin to feel awkward. Just pull up the logs and have at it afterwards, people. *The DartMUD staff is not responsible for fluid or any other resultant damage to keyboards, laptops, or any other personal belongings, hardware or otherwise.

  • Have some ideas ready, whether they be scenarios, descriptive words, or something you wanted to try with your partner(s). It is the equivalent of impotence for everyone involved to stand there waiting for you because you can't think something decent up.

  • Keep anatomy in mind. For a good sexual experience, try to be mindful of the way your body and everyone else's involved is built. Insisting a spyder has a penis or a gnome and ogre can engage in intercourse is wrong. If your character still wants to be involved sexually with a physically incompatible character, it's probably best to suggest a racechange (in a sensitive and polite manner, of course).

    If you stick roughly to these guidelines, mudsex will be fulfilling and enjoyable to all parties involved. Always be mindful of your partners and their feelings.

    Happy sexing!